The Dangers of Classroom Romances
November 16, 2009 | ama83Eyes meet across the room. Someone smiles while the other bashfully smiles in return before directing their eyes
back to the homework. Many relationships start up in classrooms over the droll of lectures. In fact, statistics show that the higher percentages of married couples met either at work or at school. Fourteen percent is not exactly a high enough percentage to be scary or reassuring. However, the situation of a classroom romance lends itself to speculate if starting a relationship in school is any worse than starting a relationship at work.
In my own experiences, I have noticed that when a relationship is started in class, there is some potential for the couple and the school work to go well…in the beginning at least.
Ideally, classroom romances could make students actually show up to class because seeing that love-interest adds an incentive to enduring the teacher’s lecture or homework. And earning a study-partner for that class is an added bonus to the deal.
However, in the long run, classroom romances can cause more trouble than good. Instead of encouraging each other to go to class often students distract each other or skip class together.
From my own experience, I can remember showing up to class half-way through or skipping out early to take a rendezvous on the school grounds. We would promise to study extra hard together in the library, and test each other with quizzes over the material. But that never followed through because the library was used as quiet time to stare at each other and continue more time-consuming flirting.
By the end of the semester, that class was barely passed with a C, and I was renowned for getting at least a B in everything else. The distraction was hardly worth the drop in my GPA.
On the other hand, the more casual flirting seems to do much less damage to students’ studies. Having interest in one another can actually be beneficial since students try to encourage both sides, each caring whether the other succeeds.
Too much interest is where things get tricky. Discussions are no longer about homework; they’re about each other.
On an even worse scale, when relationships are going sour the situation can get dire. When couples are fighting, it tends to lead to the ignoring game, which could just separate the couple to opposite sides of the classroom, or it could escalate to one or both just skipping class altogether. I have had this happen in a relationship, too. Fortunately, I was not the one who decided to drop the class. It pays to learn from your mistakes and stay on the studious side. Dropping a class over a breakup is not only a waste of a student’s time in class, but a waste of money spent on the class.
So, it would seem that a classroom romance can be just as dangerous as an office romance. The only difference is that your fellow student can move on to other classes in about 4-months time. However, your future is still at stake.
Despite the insinuation here, I do not actually believe students should refrain from pairing up in class. I don’t even discourage it completely at work. Like the statistics show, it may be your future spouse you’re flirting with in chemistry. Perhaps the same amount of caution should be taken in class as is taken at work, though.
I agree, ama83, that liking someone in that class is an incentive to show up. For me, at least, these are very fond memories. I made it to class and did also learn.
Thank you for that trip down memory lane!