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You got Rejected…Now What?!

Rejection hurts on all levels. It hurts when the guy you like won’t answer your texts, when the teacher hates the paper you just worked fourteen hours on, and when the college of your dreams says you aren’t exactly what they’re looking for. It stings to be told you aren’t wanted, you aren’t good enough, or you just don’t have what it takes.

When you fail, you no longer have hopes of achieving what you set out to do. What you do still have: is courage. I believe in a quote by Bob Dole when he addressed the Senate after he retired: ”Success and Failure are not polar opposites”.

Success and failure may seem like opposites, but in reality the polar opposite would be not having the courage to try at all. Trying out for a campus musical production, auditioning for vocal group, or dance team, all require bravery and effort. Putting in the effort to make it all the way to the audition, holding your head high and giving the audition your best, all take a lot of will power and determination. Sometimes we work hours, days, months, years on trying to make our goals become realities.

Applying for college for instance: the application itself is difficult to finish in just one sitting. It will take days to complete, weeks for the University to receive your SAT scores, transcript, and teacher recommendations. However, you have been working for years in your classes in order to get high enough grades required by your dream University.

Some students are more hooked on getting into that ONE particular school than others. Whether it be pressure from parents, or pressure they put on themselves, it can feel like the end of the world when the letter they receive in the mail is a small envelope rather than a big acceptance package. Working for so long, we start to measure our self worth on whether or not we acheive this one particular ideal.

It happens later in life too. Division I athletes train for months on end for the final game or meet. If they fail to win, they feel like failures. All the time they spent training feels wasted, but in reality was it really a waste?

Aren’t there other reasons for trying in the first place besides simply winning and achieving the goal? The process, the journey, is often pushed on fast forward and rarely enjoyed. However, without the process the athletes wouldn’t have bonded as strongly with their teammates, they would not have acheived a high level of physical fitness, and they’d be sitting on the sidelines watching the world pass by helplessly.

The anticipation of that final success, score, or win, is hard not to focus on. However, I think we should all try and make more of an effort to focus on each step of the process rather than the end product. We’ll be wasting our time if we fail to acknowledge all that we can learn from the process, regardless of whether we win or lose.

Last night I auditioned to be a featured dancer in the musical production on campus: “Footloose.” It was a spur of the moment decision. I saw the flyer in the University student center, and decided: “Hey, why not try out?” I had loved dance and cheerleading in middle and high school.

I missed the camaraderie from learning new dance sequences and performing on stage. I missed the adrenaline rush and the friendships I had formed while dancing. So I went to the auditions, received a call-back for round II, but failed to make it to round III. I was cut.

That’s right, I was rejected. Wearing an “L” on my forehead with a few other girls, I started to make the 20 minute walk back to my house with another girl. We started to talk and hit it off.

I may have failed to land the dancing part, but at least I tried. If I hadn’t gone to the auditions in the first place I wouldn’t have bonded with a few really nice girls and I wouldn’t have had the chance to challenge my body with unfamiliar dance moves.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed, but why dwell on something you have no control over? Time to move on, learn from the past, and do other things I enjoy!